Another Loss
by X.summergrey.X
Summary: Another horrible thing happens to Tohru again. Can she pull through like last time or will this time change her completely? What are her thougths on it and everything else? Warning* lanuage.Character death. Rated T being i just want to make sure.


**I hope this story is okay. I have a long Authors note at the end and it says what I was trying to do. Gosh I hope I got everything right, I've read the manga and watched the anime. But still. This is my first piece writing of Fruit Basket. And I gave Tohru more credit here. I don't think she's really as dense to some stuff as she lets on. Or that's just me. **

**Sorry if there are errors, I may look through it a few times but I seem to always miss something.**

**Plus I don't know all the Japanese terms for people. Sorry. *I don't own anything about Fruit Basket, only wish I came up with all that. Really is one of the best I've read***

**Now on with the Story.**

Tohru was sitting at her desk listening to the teacher talk like the good girl she was. The teacher was talking about how to work a problem in math. She was having some trouble following the step. Thinking, _'How does this step get to the other step?'_ She really didn't want to have to bother Yuki-kun again about this. She always felt bad even though he would tell her not to be. He was part of the student counsel, so how could she always bug him with problems when he had so much going on?

Next to her she could hear Arisa-chan asking Saki-chan if she would want to play poor man, rich man during lunch break. Saki-chan agreed that it would be a splendid idea and that they should ask Tohru to play as well. They were not paying attention to the man upfront and she felt the need to tell them to pay attention but also didn't want to get in trouble.

In the middle of Arisa saying how they should get Kyo to play and get him all fired up, just to get a rise out of him. She loved messing with him all the time. Someone knocked on the door and the teacher went to answer it. Tohru decided this would be a good chance to fix one of her ribbon in her hair. The yellow ones Yuki gave her. It was loose and some hair was getting in the way. When she was about to put it in she heard her name being called.

"Miss Honda would you please come here?" Her teacher asked in a tense voice.

Confused, she stood up not looking anywhere but the door to see another teacher, the gym teacher, standing there looking worried. As she approached the two men did she get a sense of Déjà vu.

In a whisper to her the gym teacher said, "I'm so sorry Miss Honda but we got a phone call saying that your Grandfather is in the hospital and that you should get there as soon as possible."

Her whole world shifted again in that moment. Her body tight from the shock and slowly began too shake. The ribbon she was about to put back in her hair, where it rightfully belonged, slipped from her fingers and slowly fell to the ground. Thinking the word NO, over and over again. Her lungs felt like they froze; breathing was hard to do and she had no idea what expression was on her face. Her heart was pounding over time, sounding like drums in her ears. She didn't think, no way, she could walk out this door, calm and silently worrying, like she did for her mother on that day, May 1. She wasn't even sure if she was seeing the world around her. In a way she knew the teacher was right there, looking at her with worry and that the students behind her were silent but there was apart of her blind to reality, not wanting to believe what was happening.

Then she felt hands on her. Holding her arms and one on her head. She looked and it was her two best, female friends. And like last time, they went with her. They were the only people, things, making her walk to the one place she didn't, weren't ready for.

Un be noticed to the four that lift the room. Two students stood up very fast, one with orange hair and the other with grey, knocking over the chairs. The whispering students before, all stopped and looked at them. The Sohma boys could care less about that, they both shared a look, getting what the other one was silently saying and made way for the door. Of course the teacher had to be a bastard about this and shut the door before they could leave, saying how no more students were leaving the class room.

Kyo balled up his fist glaring a promised death glare if he as so much tried to stop him again. Then felt the need to get his point crossed as to yell and curse at the bolding man before him. He didn't touch the man but made sure he's words did. He was beyond pissed that this was happening, trying to keep him from going to Tohru, his precise Tohru, when it was so clear that something bad happened. He saw that painful look on her face; he doesn't even think he's ever seen one that bad, didn't think she was capable of making that kind of expression. It was more painful then the look she gave him after seeing his true form and that was saying something to him.

Yuki was about the same level of anger as his cat cousin was but since Kyo was doing the verbal use for both of them, he didn't say a word. He just glared at the teacher seeing at he feared for his life. He was surprised that Kyo hadn't landed a finger on the middle age man yet. He wasn't able to see the look on miss Honda-san face from where he was sitting but he saw her body shaking and the ribbon fall from her small hands. The ribbon he gave her no less. He didn't want to stay in this class room, silently wondering what could have happened like last time. She was his friend this time and he would do anything to protect her, she already did so much for him and he would repay her by being there for her.

Seeing that his wasn't getting them anywhere, the man was too scared to say a word. He put his hand on Kyo shoulder. "Stop. This isn't getting us anywhere Kyo." He stated calmly, that even surprised him a little.

The bolding man gulped and sweated more hearing the young man talk so eerily calm.

"What the Hell do you think I'm trying to do?" Kyo shouted back. Clearly still on his anger high.

Yuki ignored his cousin like so many times before and looked to there teacher. "We are going to check on Miss Honda-san. Don't even try to stop us." he stated with no room to argue and left the room with Kyo right on his tail murmuring something about how he should have done that sooner you damn rat.

It was cloudy outside on this dark moody day. Tohru didn't think anything could bring her happiness after this, not this time. It's been three days since her grandfather passed away from a heart attack. He was on his way to eat lunch in the kitchen and fell to his knees holding his chest, as she was told. She was glad that someone was home to get him to the hospital and that they even called the school to tell her.

Now she was standing in front of her loving grandfathers' grave with so many people there to support. She was dressed in a black dress. Well, all the girls were and the men in black attire.

**Flash back three days ago. **

They; her family on her fathers side, Arisa-chan, Saki-chan and later Yuki-kun and Kyo-kun showed up. They waited for two hours while he was in surgery. Doctors trying to save his life but when the doctor came out to talk to them, he gave the most heart felt apology for their loss. He didn't make it. Simple as that, he was old and had a heart attack and didn't make. Simple. All I could do was stare where the doctor had stood moments before, or hours before, time seemed to stop.

My family, those people were crying. Aunty, Uncle and my cousins were holding each other. They didn't say anything to me, as far as I'm aware of. Arisa and Saki were crying as well, holding on to me, comforting me but it felt distant. I think I was in shock still. He is….was the only family I had that truly cared for me. My mother parents, I have never met them, they didn't want their daughter and they didn't want me. My aunt and uncle along with my cousins looked down on me for reason they thought were true but in fact weren't. They think I'm a tramp because I live with three men who aren't related to me. They see a teenage girl on the verged of becoming what my mother once was, not the loving mother she was to me. Can't even see I can't insult someone behind there back with out feeling guilty.

I haven't cried. Why haven't I cried?

"Why aren't you crying? Do you even care that OUR Grandfather is dead?" said her female cousin.

I looked at her, not at the spot that had stopped time. It seems to be starting again. Sigh. She was angry at me, I could tell. She also had tears falling down her red face. Of course I care.

"Not now kids." My uncle said tiredly. "Honey we must fill out some papers. Kids come along with us." he said to his family, not me, not Tohru. I didn't even say anything.

"Tohru, we'll deal with everything. We will call you so you know the schedule." My aunt said before walking away. Was I not good enough to help out? Did they think I was to dumb to do anything?

"Damn people." Kyo mumbled.

"Miss Honda-san, I'm so sorry." Yuki said to me. All I could do was look at him. What was I to say? I didn't think my voice would work anyways. My throat felt so dry, I felt so dry.

Why should he even be sorry? He didn't cause my grandfather to have the heart attack. He wasn't the reason for my sweet grandfather to leave….leave. He left me. He left me like everyone else did, my mother, my father. But…..I left him first didn't I? I decided to leave and go live with Yuki, Kyo, and Shigure. I was being so selfish. So selfish. I hadn't even seen him lately. It's been five days since I went to visit. How couldn't I go see him every day? It would have been better. How I was so blind to this, he was old. I should of known it could have been any day now really. I should have known he couldn't stay here forever just because I wanted him too. What a fool I've been this time. I feel so guilty. It hurts, this hurts so much. But no tears will come.

I heard a gasp to my side, breaking my train of thoughts.

"Tohru…your electric waves…." Saki had brought her hands to her mouth and her eyes filled with fresh tears.

"What are you saying Hana-san?" Arisa had asked. I didn't really get it either but part of me didn't care. When have I not cared about something?

"It hurts. It's so terrible. Tohru don't be so hopeless. We are all here for you." She said reaching out to me. Was that what I was, hopeless? Is that one of the feelings I'm feeling? Could I pick myself up like last time?

**End of flash back. **

When we left to go home, we all went back to Yuki, Kyo, and mine. I didn't say anything really. I wasn't ready to talk. I was trying to deal with these emotions of course. Shigure had told me how sorry he was too. One of the boys called him and told him. The last three days had gone by in a blur. I do remember that I tried to cook something for dinner that night but I ended up burning my hand, then Kyo took over. I mostly stayed in my room, when ever I tried to help out around the house I made a mess. I couldn't do anything and it made me feel even guiltier. But –

I still haven't been able to cry.

Currently I was holding my best friends hands. One in each hand. My family was a few feet away talking to the priest. Many of the Sohma family came as well; Yuki, Kyo, Shigure, Momiji, and Haru. The funeral had ended a few minutes before and we were all just standing around now. None of the other Sohma's could make it since they feared Akito would fine out.

My two cousins came over to my friends and I. What were they going to say? I wondered. They haven't said much to me since the hospital.

"Tohru I should apologize for what I said at the hospital to you. Of course you care for grandfather." She said.

"Yes. We all grieve differently as mother says. So I'm sorry also for what she said. "he said.

Can't lie and say I wasn't surprised that they had apologized to me, they never have anything nice to say and if they do it's followed by a rude remark afterwards. Maybe things well get better from here on out?

"Thank you." I replied.

"Well you sure do have interesting friends here Tohru. Say, is that your natural hair color somehow or do you dye it?" he was looking at Haru's black and white hair.

"Yes it is natural. If you don't believe me I could show you." He said so calmly.

"No!" said Yuki and Kyo at the same time. I still don't get how he can prove it or need to go into another room to.

"Err…okay." My male cousin said. Not getting it either.

"So I recognize two of you from before. Who's the third guy she shacked up with?" she asked looking around at the boys curiously.

And here is the rude remark. I didn't really like it; it wasn't just insulting me but Yuki and Kyo too.

"You people Piss me off you know that!" Kyo growled at them. None of the boys looked like that liked that remark. Arisa and Saki didn't either.

"Now, now. No need to start a fight at a funeral, right?" Shigure said. "I'm Shigure Sohma and I'm watching over Tohru and the boys. I assure you no funny business is going on you two." He said looking at my cousins. His voice held his usual calm, sing-song way. Trying to make the situation less tense I guess.

"Really. Do you know how to act like an adult? You make it sound like there is." Yuki said lightly to Shigure but I still heard him. Kyo said he want to punch him.

My male cousin gave them and me a weird look. "Should she be around so many weird people? I mean, look at them?" he tried to whisper to his sister. My grandfather was right; they are disagreeing people by natural!

Hana-san let go of my hand and turned more to my cousins saying how the Sohma's do have a weird electric wave signal, but they are good to Tohru none the else. Uo-san also let go and was saying how if anyone is going to insult them, it will be her. I think I smiled at this, she shows her caring emotions at odd times. But nice to know how they care for them because I do.

"Yay! Tohru smiled!" Momiji said in his normal cheeriness. It was nice to hear and he was now holding my free hands in his. "How about we go eat something after this and then get some ice cream. What do you think Tohru?" he asked.

I wasn't that hungry but maybe some of the others are. I'm thinking I probably won't be able to cook and I feel so bad that Kyo-kun has been the last couple days. He should take a break. I was going to answer Momiji when I heard a horrible thing coming out of her mouth, my cousin.

"What Total freaks she hangs out with! She's probably going to turn into her gang leader mother any day now." the look on her face was one of disgust.

Something inside just snapped. Clean cut like a twig. I was so tired of their rudeness. I removed my hands from Momiji's and turned to her, the one that said it but I know there both to blame. They have both said such ugly things to me and about my mother.

There was two different smack sounds in the air. It seemed so loud; wouldn't there be other noises to make it not?

My hand was up in the air still. I had slapped them. Both of them. I had used violence on them.

"Don't you DARE insult my friends OR my mother again!" I heard my voice; it was so full of anger and bite. I had never felt so mad at someone before. My breathing was fast and I wanted to make a fist. But I just lowered my hands to my sides instead. It stung a little….okay a lot.

They looked so shocked and both of them had a red mark on there face. Good. They should show there ugliness to the world and my hand print is just that. Proof. Both of them ran to there parents to tell on me I'm sure. My uncle looked shocked to see their faces and my aunt looked horrified and gasped.

It reminded me of the time grandfather had slapped my cousin for something he said. Then I was taken back to Kyo, Yuki and Shigure….. I turned from my family and looked at my friends now remembering they were behind me.

Hana, Uo, Yuki and Kyo looked shocked as well. I've never used violence. Shigure looked more amused and thoughtful at me. Haru I couldn't tell. He's good at holding his emotions in. And Momiji, he was surprised as well but there was another emotion. Fear.

I…I scared him!

Seeing that look on his face being replaced; it should be a happy, innocent face. Something inside me shifted, I could tell something was changing. My anger drained away fast and this heavy feeling was crashing into me. My heart felt so weighed down and my breathing picked up again but not from anger. This pressure rose to my eyes as well. They stung and I think I'm finely going to cry. But I can't let them see me like this, not after what just happened. I have to get out of here.

I started to walk away. How could I ever show my face to them again? I've changed so much in the last couple days. They've seen the darkness that has been in my heart that I have been trying to hide all this time. I thought if I just moved forward, did what I had to each day that it would go away but…now that my grandfather is gone. That sadness is just growing. I would always push it away. But can I still do that?

If I died, would the remaining of my family even care? I'm sure my friends would though.

But….

I feel so alone. My father who I barely remember is gone. Only the stories my mother would tell me of him. My mother was taken from me to soon. Now my Grandfather. Who stood up for me; who was so caring and loving to me. And, if I don't break the curse for the Sohma's, they will leave me forever. I know they will. Akito will call them all back sometime. Plus, Hana-san and Uo-san will go to collage and grow up and have a family of their own. I'll be left completely alone.

This made me cry even harder. It was all coming out and I didn't know how to stop. It hurt so much and I was worried I would stop breathing from it. Can a person really die from heart ache? Would it be different then a heart attack?

I stopped when I heard my name being called behind me on impulse. It was Momiji who came after me and grabbed both my hands again. It felt so nice. They felt so warm.

"I'm sorry Tohru. You took us all by surprised but were not made at you at all. I promise. We are all here for you got that." He said. He looked so sad and he tried to wipe away some of my tears.

But it only made me cry more, I felt so guilty. Guilty for hitting my cousins even though I was defending the people I love. Guilty for thinking that I didn't have the Sohma's anymore. Because I do, I have them right here for me at the moment. I should make it all count just incase though. My two best female friends would never leave me with out saying goodbye at least. I could never be that selfish and ask them to stay with me forever. There happiness means the world to me.

I wanted to move closer to him, to hug him and even though he would turn into a rabbit, I wouldn't mind. I just want to hold onto someone because I don't know how much longer I can stand. But I can't. Not here in public. Not where people could see and then Hatori would be made to erase their memories, maybe even mine and I just wasn't ready to forget them, I never would be ready. I held onto his hand tighter, maybe to tight because even though things were blurry, I could still see the pained look on his face. So I turned around and saw Saki-chan was the closes to me and ran to her. I held her as close as I could and I felt my knees give out and I sat there with her crying. There were weird noises filling the air and I think they were coming from me.

I sat there crying my heart out. I don't know who long but long enough for my body to ache for being in the same spot for so long. I cried the tears that have been refusing to shed from the last three days. The more I cried the heavy, unbearable feeling in my chest grew lighter. My mind became clear and I realized what a fool I've been again.

I shouldn't feel guilty that I wasn't living with my grandfather. He wanted me to be happy, that's why I was living with the Sohma's. I saw him as much as I could with everything going on. He never complained about it. I'll learn to control this temper I seem to have but I'm still again violence. I'll fulfill my mothers promise by graduating high school. I'll continue to try and break the curse for everyone.

I have things I need to fulfill and I can't just sit around mourning. I have to take action. I know he wouldn't want me to not live my life. I know mother would be sad if I didn't do that. He's up there with my parents smiling down on me. I'm picking myself up again and moving on but I'll always think about them.

When I was able to stop crying it was dusk out. I cried for a really long time it seemed. I was so tired mentally and physically but I knew the boys wouldn't be able to carry me with out making a show and I could never ask the girls, well the boys either.

They all looked happy that I wasn't crying any more. But I could still see the sadness.

I cleared my throat to say something, to reassure them. "I'm okay. Thank you for waiting and being here and being so kind. I'm grateful to you all." And I smiled for them but I felt the need to. I really don't know what I would do with out them all. That is why I will work twice as hard to make sure they stay in my life. I love them all so much in different way. They are like….they are my family.

I could hear clearly again too. The birds flying over head going who knows where? The wind in the trees sounded like maracas. The smell in the air was intoxicating with flowers. It was a peaceful feeling and I was looking forward to the next day again. My senses weren't cloudy any more like they have been the last couple days. It was so grey and stuffy before.

Kyo then walked up to me holding his hand out. There was something yellow in it. My ribbon!

"Here, you left this in the class room." He said while not looking at me but the ground. His face was a little red, how cute. I took it from him. I had wondered where it went. The ones Yuki had given me and now that kyo has given it back, it's like a present from them both.

"Thank you Kyo-kun."

"You kept that for three days?" Yuki asked him confused.

"What? There wasn't a good time before that's all." He defended himself.

Shigure sang "Kyo's a stalker. Tohru you better keep watch on your stuff."

While Momiji sang "Kyo likes Tohru!" over and over again.

"Will you two shut up! I don't have to defend myself to the likes of you!" he yelled at Momiji and Shigure. Then to Haru, "you shut up too." He said while pointing.

"I didn't say anything Kyo. Are you losing your hearing?" he said as smoothly as ever.

"No I'm not! And I can just hear your thoughts in there."

"Damn. I guess you know my plan to steal Tohru away." He sighed looking bored. Like now he has nothing to do since Kyo found out about his master plan.

This had gotten Kyo worked up and he started to yell more. Momiji started to sing 'Haru likes Tohru' now. That seems to make Kyo madder. Yuki was trying to stop the bickering. Uo-chan joined in on the fun. Shigure looked amused again. Saki-chan and Tohru were just sitting watching it all play out.

Things were going to be just fine.

**Summergrey here: I've had this idea in my head for a long time but now just put it on paper or well Microsoft word paper. I was thinking what if they happened during the manga? Sorry if you haven't finished it and now you know it doesn't. But anyways. What if this happened? I don't really think Tohru would be the same. She seems to be able to move on after her mother but there are times where you see just how she really feels, depressed it happen. I feel she is forcing it. So here she doesn't have the strength at first to force that smile on her face. The girl needs some time. I felt so bad putting her through this, I really did. I tried my best with this. I ended it on a good note because I didn't want to end it badly. Also, I didn't put to much detail in it because when your so depressed, you don't see them. Most of this was Tohru's POV. **

**Plus with her family. I don't think we ever find out there names, I'm not sure. So just incase they do have names, I just called them her/he and female/male. I cant remember what the manga said, so I got their personality from the anime. I think it was episode 5. When her grandfather slapped him. The guy doesn't seem that old so I am thinking it was her cousin. If I'm wrong, sorry. **

**Sorry this is a long author's note but wanted to get some stuff across. Please tell me what you think. That would be great…gosh this was about 7 ½ pages long. Anyways have a good day or night. **


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